Over the Hill?!

Dear Mom,

I thought I'd break my unintentional silence to wish you the happiest of birthdays this morning. Somewhere, in some way, you are celebrating your 50th year of a wonderful life that we all know was cut much too short. Is this the age they say you're 'Over the Hill'? Well, I certainly wish you were merely that far away from me.

A few months ago I drove the 8 hours home to Maine with my boyfriend to throw Dad a 50th surprise birthday party-- Harley Davidson themed, of course. And yes, I even tucked away my button-up sweaters and skinny-leg jeans for a night of bandanas, leather boots, and homemade ass-less chaps (and they say being in a sorority doesn't teach you anything?!). It was the best birthday party he said he ever had, complete with a video slideshow I made him to play at the local little bar we held it at that was always your favorite. The photos that reminded us that we used to be captured as a family of four had even my old high school friends tearing up, but I was smart to put it to "Sweet Child of Mine"-- who can cry during that anyway?! Weirdos.

Today I woke up wondering what we'd be doing to celebrate your 50th. I'm pretty sure you'd already be putting on that oh so up-to-date flowery one-piece bathing suit, grabbing a glass of caffeine-free diet Pepsi, and heading out to the pool with your sunglasses and whatever book was next on your chopping block. They better have that set up in Heaven for you; I think you've earned it.

Dad's love for motorcycles has only continued to grow over the years as his love for playing pool has lessened. What would you love even more today? Maybe cooking? Scrap booking? A Harley of your own?

The only answer I know would be true is... me. You would love me even more today.

I miss that love. I miss you.

But I am okay, I promise.

I am happy, but you see that, wherever you're watching me from.

But stop watching me today-- it's your day-- LET'S PARTY!

Happy 50th Mom.

I love you,
Sami